In which I shall wear a dress

I have decided to set a few goals for myself for this summer.

I have long term goals:

Raise great kids so they contribute to the world being a better place.
Buy a home.
Plant a garden and eat fresh food from same garden.

I have shorter term goals:

Get accepted into the Medical Assistant program at the local community college. (An actual career, instead of customer service, in order to help meet a couple of the previously mentioned goals.)
Get health insurance again for hubby and me.

Today, however, I decided I needed to set some even shorter term goals. Not so short term as to be labeled a 'to do list' but maybe... Summer Goals.

So, here goes:

Take the family horseback riding.
Take the family camping.
Wear a sundress.

That last one kind of bugs me a bit. I used to wear dresses all the time. Sundresses  house dresses, tailored work type dresses. Broomstick skirts and peasant blouses. All the time. I only rarely wore jeans.

Now? Now I wear jeans all the time. I have come to realize that I hate my body and wear clothes to cover it up and be comfortable. I have decided to stop saying "I'll wear a sundress when I get down to size _____." Or "I don't wear shorts at this weight."

It's my body. It's the only one I've got. It's entirely possible it's the only one I'm going to ever have, and as such I need to treat it that way. It is a glorious body. 10 working fingers, 10 working toes. 2 brown eyes that crinkle up at the corners when I really smile. Breasts that nourished 3 children for a total of more than 2 years. Hips that are wide from carrying them for 9 months each (and a few other reasons, but none that are relevant!) Arms that are strong and give great hugs! Shoulders that are soft and warm to cry on or lean on as needed. Soft lips for kissing or being kissed. Sturdy legs that hold me up and get me where I need to go.

So what if my ankles are not matchsticks that would crumple under the weight of all of this awesomeness? So what if my belly is big? So what if I make someone else uncomfortable? I was uncomfortable first, and I am tired of it. I am tired of hating my body. I am tired of being uncomfortable with mirrors. I am tired of being uncomfortable in my own skin. I am tired of not wearing cute clothes because I am uncomfortable with exposing my flesh. My generous, one of a kind, lovely body deserves to be loved. And more than anything I can think of, I deserve to love my body.

Therefore: I shall wear a sundress!